Getting divorced amicably without blaming each other or fault

By the Editorial Team · Monday, July 27, 2026

Writer Don Shiau and his former wife utilized Singapore’s new divorce by mutual agreement law, which allows couples to end their marriage without assigning fault, finalizing their divorce smoothly after nearly three years of separation. This non-adversarial option, now the third most common ground for divorce in Singapore, aims to reduce hostility and improve post-divorce relations while requiring couples to demonstrate efforts to reconcile before court approval.

Writer Don Shiau, 45, and his former wife waited nearly three years before filing for divorce, opting to use Singapore’s newly introduced legal pathway of divorce by mutual agreement, which took effect on July 1, 2024. The couple, who were married for four years and have no children, chose this route as they felt it was neither truthful nor fair to cite fault-based reasons such as unreasonable behaviour for ending their marriage.

Shiau explained that their separation was not marked by serious issues like adultery or abuse but rather differences in how they managed conflict. “We had very different approaches to resolving conflict, and it ended up taking a toll on both of us,” he said. Both parties sought marriage counselling and discernment counselling—attending a total of 25 and five sessions respectively—in efforts to salvage their relationship. Ultimately, they concluded that reconciliation was not possible, and they filed for divorce, finalised about four months later in a process Shiau described as smooth and amicable.

According to the 2025 marriage and divorce statistics released by the Department of Statistics on July 10, nearly one in five civil (non-Muslim) divorces last year cited divorce by mutual agreement as the ground for dissolution. This method is now the third most common reason, following unreasonable behaviour and separation for three years or more. It is one of six legally recognised “facts” under Singapore’s Women’s Charter to prove that a marriage has irretrievably broken down, with divorce by mutual agreement classified among the non-fault-based options.

Legal experts note that this new approach can reduce acrimony by eliminating the need for one spouse to be labelled the wrongdoer. Gloria James-Civetta, head lawyer of Gloria James-Civetta & Co, emphasized that fault-based divorces require specific allegations, which can deepen hostility and lead to painful confrontations during the legal process. Jessica Chow, associate director of family law at PKWA Law Practice, added that avoiding blame contests generally facilitates better post-divorce communication, benefiting any children involved.

Despite some initial concerns that introducing divorce by mutual agreement would lead to higher divorce rates, data shows the overall number of civil divorces in Singapore declined slightly to 5,288 in 2025, down from 5,638 in 2024 and 5,649 in 2023. Angelina Hing, director of Integro Law Chambers, noted that couples do not take the decision to divorce lightly, regardless of legal options.

Experts caution, however, that divorce by mutual agreement is not a shortcut. Rajan Chatterji, managing director of Rajan Chatterji LLC, explained that couples must still provide detailed reasons to the Family Justice Courts on why the marriage failed and outline their efforts to save it. This includes attending counselling or seeking counsel from family, friends, or religious leaders. Courts may delay or deny divorces if they believe reconciliation remains possible.

For Shiau, the introduction of divorce by mutual agreement offered a humane alternative to traditional fault-based grounds by sparing the couple from rehashing grievances. The amicable end to their marriage also allowed them to maintain a cordial relationship. “If we can’t have a good marriage, at least we have a good divorce,” he said.

This article was reported by synthesizing coverage from multiple independent news outlets to present a balanced, unbiased account. Read about our editorial standards. Spotted an error? Let us know.