In the aftermath of a high-profile lawsuit filed by a former Cornell University student alleging she was gang-raped by seven men at a fraternity house, a growing number of fathers across the United States have begun publicly discussing the importance of raising boys to understand consent, respect, and healthy masculinity.
Danny Jordan, a children’s book author and father of two in California, was among the first to speak out. After reading details of the lawsuit, which included screenshots of Snapchat messages from over 50 fraternity members discussing the incident, Jordan was struck by the lack of male voices addressing the case. “Not enough men are talking about the Cornell 7 situation,” he said in a video posted to Instagram last month. Jordan emphasized the responsibility of fathers to prepare their sons to engage respectfully with women and to intervene if they witness or face situations of misconduct.
His video resonated widely, reaching over a million viewers and prompting other fathers to share their own conversations about consent and bystander intervention. Parenting influencers such as Alan Gilliam and Paul Avellino have posted age-appropriate discussions with their young children, modeling responses to scenarios involving respecting boundaries and standing up against bullying or harassment. For example, Avellino’s son confidently stated he would tell others to “stop” if they were mistreating a girl and that he would not fear being mocked for defending her.
Experts suggest that this emerging engagement by fathers represents a significant shift from past societal responses to campus sexual assault cases, which often centered on advising women while seldom holding men accountable in public discourse. Sociologist Nicole Bedera highlights the importance of positive male role models who promote gender equality and healthy masculinity. She notes that men must be taught to see women as equals and to resist peer pressure that perpetuates harmful behavior. Bedera also points out that group sexual violence frequently stems from attempts to assert power and status among men, rather than hatred toward women, meaning that changing group dynamics and definitions of masculinity is critical.
In addressing these issues within families, Bedera emphasizes that fathers can lead by example through actions such as sharing household responsibilities typically seen as feminine, supporting emotional expression in boys, and fostering inclusive social environments that reduce risks of harmful behavior. Building strong, respectful relationships within the family and holding oneself accountable can set a foundation for healthier interactions beyond the home.
Content creators Jon Gustin, known as “The Tired Dad,” and Dominic DeMark of “DadsTimesTwo” echo these perspectives. Gustin, a father of two, hopes to break traditional stereotypes by encouraging emotional openness and accountability. He wants his son to be the person who stands against wrongdoing, even if it means losing friendships. DeMark, along with his husband Jeremy, is raising a son and a daughter with an emphasis on emotional safety and boundary respect, challenging the idea that boys must suppress sensitivity or conform to rigid gender roles.
While both acknowledge there is significant progress still to be made, they and others see a growing movement among fathers to engage actively in conversations about consent and gender equality. This new dialogue, sparked in part by the Cornell case, highlights a cultural shift toward redefining masculinity and parental responsibility in shaping future generations.